Systemic Therapy

What is Systemic Therapy?

In systemic therapy a person is not seen alone but always within their social and situational context. We all are influenced by our native culture and the one we are living in currently, the political system, parents, friends, lovers, colleagues, neighbors, and even the person we smile at on the street. Each of them causes us to react differently to what is happening around us. All these aspects and people that influence us are called our “system”. One person can be part of several systems at the same time, ranging from the societal level, over social groups, work teams, family, down to the relationships we have with one specific person. Even within ourselves we have different aspects of our personality which work together to form us as a whole person, and can therefore be considered a system. All these systems and how they influence us are what we will look at during therapy.

Within each system our interaction is determined by how we (or the aspects of our personality) speak to each other, what ideas we bring to the table, the mood we are in, or what we see in our conversation partner(s). All of these factors can cause different reactions and create different outcomes regarding conversation topics, conflicts, and decisions. Sometimes this helps us to solve a situation (for example assertiveness can be very useful to solve an immediate problem) but they can also get in our way (for example same assertiveness is not very helpful when we are trying to calm down our angry or scared child).

Why do I like to work with this approach?

We are social beings and constantly interacting with other humans. In my experience most, if not all, internal and external conflicts show during interaction with other people. We need other people’s feedback to acquire new skills, learn how to be within society, and define ourselves as a person. In this light it is not enough to see any problem just as something within ourselves or solely controlled by an external factor. Instead we need to understand how our personal system works and interacts with others, which factor(s) keep(s) up the problem and what we need to change to break the cycle.

However, what I like best about systemic therapy is, that it focuses on strengths and resources rather than weaknesses and the reasons we “failed” to do or achieve something. Through this perspective it helps to create a picture of ourselves that empowers us to try something new and improve our life and well being, instead of showing us where we assumingly failed or made mistakes.

How it can help you?

During systemic therapy we will look at all the different roles you have within your social groups, family, other forms of relationships, the different personality aspects that make you yourself, and how these roles and aspects interact. We will try to understand them and what may cause specific problems or general struggle in your life, and to change the interactions in a way that nourishes your systems rather than inhibits them. This means, that even though we will look at those aspects within your live that do not work the way you want it, we will always focus on finding the resources and strengths within you as a person and your system. However, focusing on resources does not mean “sweet-talking” and unconditional acceptance of everything, so be prepared to challenge your values, views, and perceptions. Even though understanding and questioning them might feel uncomfortable in the beginning, it is what will bring relieve, change, and growth in the long term.